finish line

you can do it. two and a half days left. it's just a defense draft, you can always return to it. it's not going to solve the world's problems. in fact, no one may ever read it, and that's okay. it's your first attempt to articulate the way you see things. you may change your mind in the future, and disagree with what you write today. it's good, though. even emerson thinks so. what happened to mom isn't going to happen to you. you have a solid support network here in ithaca to back you up. mom didn't. no one believed in her, and so she didn't believe in herself. people believe that you have something to say, something that is unique. speak that voice. don't hide in anxiety and fear. stop obstructing yourself from progress because the perfect words don't appear on the page, the perfect ideas, the things that people will wonder why they haven't been discussed yet. it's a fucked up mess that is so much bigger than you realize. do not carry that burden alone. this is your catharsis. this is your first chance to speak from the outside.

and know that your family will always love you, despite the cognitive dissonance you may create in their mind. that's okay. it's all going to be okay.

twentyfive.

at about 12:03 eastern sunday morning, in the company of good friends and under the influence of a bit of cabernet sauvignon, i declared my twenty-sixth year the year of letting go.



here's to the surrender to serendipity!

mail day!

today was a very exciting mail day. i documented the fun with pictures.



who do i know that lives in milwaukee?!



ooh! i know what this is! but with a brat fry? this is already amazing, and i've only seen the cover.



i just love this design. my friend meghan's sister emily designed it. fabulous, no? and the fun is only getting started.



hey, this person also lives on green[e] street! but who are they? and in brooklyn? intrigue.



the 2010 buy local eat seasonal tea towel by claudia pearson illustration! what?! how?! oh, right. my birthday is sunday. but who?! thank you, mystery person!

now, if my new yorker could just arrive, mail day would be complete.